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    47 Things To Put In Your Own Stocking Because, Duh, You Deserve It

    The best stockings have something cool, something useful, and something random. You're worth all three and more.

    1. An unnerving (but hilarious) keychain featuring Dunder Mifflin's most ambitious employee, Dwight Schrute, wearing a CPR dummy's face. Gift yourself a physical version of one of the most chaotic scenes from The Office.

    reviewer's hand holding the keychain

    2. A gemstone sensor night-light with a long-lasting LED bulb that will make your hallway, bedroom, or bathroom look like an enchanted crystal cavern. You might even feel a bit more magical every time you pass by this gem.

    purple, pink, and light blue stones that light up

    3. A Pokémon Nanoblock set that'll keep you busy while you wait for the holiday dinner to be finished.

    four pokemon characters made from nanoblocks

    4. A handmade ring featuring the skyline of one of several cities to remind you of your favorite vacation memories. You could even start a ring collection, and add to it when you visit a new city.

    cityscape rings

    5. A jumbo pack of satin scrunchies that won't pull on your hair and won't strip your hair of any moisture. It'll also look super cute on your wrist as a fashion accessory.

    reviewer wears scrunchie and gives thumbs up to big pile of scrunchies

    6. Or bow-topped velvet scrunchies for an extra touch of cuteness. It doesn't matter if you have SUPER thick hair — this accessory belongs in your stocking!

    velvet scrunchie with bow

    7. A Black History tote bag sure to turn heads! This bag features a civil rights-inspired button designs, including the faces and quotes of icons like Martin Luther King Jr., Fannie Lou Hamer, Angela Davis, Malcolm X, and more.

    Tote in black

    8. A sweet little holiday cat timer that can keep time for up to 60 minutes and help you make sure you don't burn the cookies! Now you and your friends can have a proper holiday-themed cook off.

    9. An Elf Snowball Showdown card game everyone can enjoy, even if you only get less than two inches of snow a year. Start a "surprise" snowball fight with your friends and family! When you’re the target, roll the jumbo snowball dice to dodge the icy barrage. When you get hit, take a snowball “splat” card — three hits and you’re out. The last elf standing wins!

    the card game

    10. A pet moss ball that comes with a hilariously small cowboy hat, because accessories are everything. This little fuzz ball might as well scream yeehaw!

    floating moss ball with tiny cowboy hat

    11. A blackhead remover kit so you can feel like a professional esthetician while you excavate pimples, blackheads, and whiteheads.

    reviewer's hand holding the extraction tool kit

    12. A mug featuring the Seinfeld characters in the iconic but chaotic parking lot episode.

    13. Or a mug with Tina Belcher holding in her chili poops. Start your holiday season with a good laugh.

    several views of of the whole mug

    14. A micro Etch-A-Sketch for all your tiniest masterpieces. You can even challenge your friends and family to a tiny art contest.

    15. A bottle of Mike's Hot honey that surprisingly goes well with anything imaginable. You can put it on pizza, wings, veggies, dumplings, salad, cocktails, and your mom's famous pot roast. I know it sounds like a gross food combo, but it even tastes good on ice cream. Don't knock it until you try it!

    bottle of honey next to wings

    16. A fuzzy cat hat to turn your fur baby into a sweet little bunny. Even the fussiest and the most stubborn pets might just let you put these ears on them. Plus, they'll make for a super cute holiday card.

    17. A 5-in-1 wine stopper capable of turning your supermarket wine into something a little more tasty. Not only will it keep the wine from spilling out of the bottle, it's also an aerator, stopper, pourer, filter, and re-corker. It's like gifting yourself five presents in one!

    wine bottle with the wine stopper in the refrigerator

    18. And a pack of wine condoms to ~safely~ store your bottle in the rare event that you don't finish it. Just place it over the neck of the bottle and put it away for later. Let this novelty gift make its way into your stocking this season.

    model's hands pulling the black wine condom out of a gold wrapper

    19. A miniature wacky waving inflatable tube man you can either place by your tree to give it a little more personality, or around the room to make your holiday party a bit more lively!

    the wacky waving inflatable tube guy

    20. Novel Tea bags for anyone who loves literature as much as they enjoy a good cup of tea. If hot cocoa isn't your thing, then maybe a warm cup of English breakfast tea might be just what you're looking for.

    the box of tea

    21. A pair of custom socks featuring your beloved fur baby. Now you can show your dog just how much you really love them. When you record their reaction, they might be uninterested or they might be terrified. Either way, it'll make for a great holiday video.

    a hand holing up a pair of socks with a dog's face on them

    22. A set of LED light saber chopsticks to make your sushi run feel a little more worth it. Whether you choose the red or the blue, the fate of the galaxy lies in your hands.

    dueling glowing lightsaber chopsticks over a bowl of rice

    23. Mented Gloss, because a nice shade that can be worn year-round is such a useful gift if you love a good lip. The buildable color means you can go from neutral to eye-popping with a few swipes.

    24. A nifty spout that turns an ordinary pump of soap into the cutest shape of Mikey Mouse. All you have to do is attach the cap to your foaming soap bottle, and it'll instantly feel like you've brought home a little bit of Disneyland magic.

    three types of pumping hand soaps with the mickey mouse tops in front of them

    25. A purrfectly adorable spoon to add some adorable humor to your cup of tea. Enhance tea time with these spoons, a cozy blanket, and a nice holiday movie.

    a hand with holding a spoon with a cat shaped handle in a cup of tea

    26. Jelly Belly flavor enhancers if you despise the taste of water, and wish you could somehow turn it into candy. Your holiday wish has been granted! Just add a few drops into your water, and you'll basically have liquid candy.

    tutti-fruitti flavor liquid drink mix

    27. A pack of squishy narwhal toys you'll definitely need if you're feeling overwhelmed, and just need to squeeze something. Each of these squish animals are filled with soft jelly beads that will have you obsessed. This will be the stress-relieving gift you didn't know you needed, but glad you bought!

    28. A kitchen knife sharpener so you can have blades so sharp, that the first slice will feel as smooth as cutting butter!

    model's hand running a knife through one of the slots on the knife sharpener. It has two slots.

    29. A Venus bust candle for your room to smell as beautiful as it looks. With scents like lavender, rose petal, and black currant jasmine, your guests will surely love the aroma and ask you where you got it. If you're not a fan of others copying you, just tell them your secret Santa got it for you.

    busy of venus with candle wick on head

    30. An at-home teeth whitening kit that'll leave you with noticeable results, even after the first use. You don't have to give up the hot cocoa, coffee, tea, or wine for whiter teeth. So keep sippin' or chuggin' your favorite beverage, and let this brightening kit magically give you a brighter smile.

    31. A cat bookmark to light up the pages of your favorite novel and make your holidays brighter!

    adult and child models reading a book with the book lamp

    32. A roll-on migraine stick if you experience unbearable headaches. It's made with a blend of peppermint, spearmint, lavender, and coconut oil essential oils, to provide you immediate relief. Just apply the stick to your temples, forehead, and back of your neck when you start feeling pain. Don't let your migraine stop your holiday cheer.

    33. A beet barrette that can also be paired with a matching bandana because nothing beets fashionable food.

    red beet on pink barrette
    Centinelle

    Centinelle is a California-based, BIPOC- and woman-owned slow fashion brand that sells fun accessories and silk scarves. 

    Get it from Centinelle for $23.

    34. Teeny-tiny hanging plants so your car can also be ridden with plants just like your biophilic home. Show your love for plants and decorate the back of your car with all types of faux foliage.

    tiny fake plant in a terracotta pot with mini macrame holder

    35. A Shrek toothpaste cap to bring a gross, butt hilarious start to your day. You've probably seen this all over TikTok, now you're seeing it here too. Maybe it's a sign to add it to your stocking?

    36. A hair finishing stick that is literally a mascara wand coated in natural hair oils. All you have to do is apply it to your hair, and style as desired. Now you can keep your bun or ponytail looking sleek, without the extra tension on your hair.

    37. Or Mielle Organics edge control gel for anyone who wants a little more hold. It's made with ingredients like, rosemary, mint, and biotin to help your hair grow. If your only wish is to restore your edges this holiday season, skip the letter to Santa and get it yourself.

    the edge control gel jar

    38. A pair of flip-up sunglasses so you can finally have an accessory that is just as dramatic as you are. When you're wearing these, you'll be so cool, Frosty the Snowman won't even be able to compete with you.

    39. A silk pillowcase that's gonna keep your hair tangle-free, while you toss and turn with excitement. I know you can't wait to see your gifts, but you need your beauty rest first!

    model sleeping on a satin pillowcase

    40. A pair of Santa flannel shorts so you can stay warm and show a little holiday cheer! They also come in other patterns, so you can switch it up if this is really your favorite time of year.

    blue shorts with santa clauses printed on them

    41. Taco Cat Goat Cheese Pizza — a card game delivering a heavy dose of high-energy! Similar to Slap Jack, this game requires the players to literally behave like animals. The player without any cards left is the winner.

    The deck with the cards face down
    A bunch of the different cards face up, each one is a different pastel color with an illustrated character on it and their name (i.e.
    Amazon

    Here's how to play: You deal all the cards out to your two to four players, and everyone keeps their mini-deck face down. Everyone takes a turn putting a card down in the middle of the table, saying one of the words "taco," "cat," "goat," "cheese," and "pizza," in that order. If the picture on your card matches the word that's said, everyone slaps their hand on the card in a pile as quickly as possible. The last person on the pile has to take the stack and add them to their cards, and whoever runs out of cards first wins!

    Promising review: "Ridiculous in a good way! I was skeptical about how much I may enjoy this game being in my mid-thirties. But it's a lot of fun! Easy to learn, easy to play, my 8-year-old has lots of fun with it. Its a great family game with the potential to be a late-night more adult-oriented event if you’re picking up what I'm throwing down. Cheers!" —Amazon Customer

    Get it from Amazon for $8.99.

    42. A jewelry-cleaning pen, meaning your ring can shine brighter than the lights on the tree. This cleaning gem is easy to use, effective, and waaayyy cheaper than a trip to the jeweler.

    top photo shows a reviewers ring looking dark and dull. the bottom photo shows the same reviewer's ring after it's been cleaned. It looks clear and shiny.

    43. A Rosebud Motel keyring, because you want your guests to feel like they've checked-in to an award-winning motel. At least this way, you can jokingly establish a checkout time.

    two keychains that say "Rosebud motel"

    44. A handheld night-light that just so happens to a hyper-realistic moon, inspired by images from NASA. You might have to set your expectations a little lower this year. I highly doubt anyone can get you a better gift than the thing that affects the tides, IJS.

    ceramic hand holding glowing moon light

    45. A pack of rainbow playing cards so you can bring the fun to any get together. Don't even bother putting these in your stocking. Pass the time with an intense game of Slap Jack, B.S., or even Go Fish.

    solid color cards placed in rainbow order to create gradient

    46. A wearable nail polish bottle holder that will make painting your nails a breeze. The rings are made of a stretchy silicone, so fingers of any size can fit. Seriously, this is the perfect self-care gift, especially if doing your own mani-pedi relaxes you.

    47. And finally, a screaming goat that shrieks when you push the button on its back. It also comes with a small booklet with fun facts and trivia. Every stocking should have at least one random thing, so here ya go!

    the screaming goat toy plus the pocket guide for it

    Reviews have been edited for length and/or clarity.